Since this blog has been left unattended for so long, i doubt anyone will visit it anymore. Gd gd, means it has attained a certain level of privacy. Haha!

Hello to the nobody! Erm, why am i suddenly blogging again? I don't know.. maybe i'm just bored.. i guess theres a certain trend to the time of the year which i would start writing on my blog again.. end of the year maybe, where i will start thinking about the year, about the future, about things i wanna do.. Find it hard to just ramdomly bring it up when talking to people or whether is there anyone interested to listen, but its too much to just store them in the head.

Here i am in Shanghai, blogging somewhere faraway from home. Studying abroad alone has been great, but theres much more than the 'cool-ness' we see on tv. Still it has been really fun, meeting new people, chinese, non-chinese, asians, americans, europeans.. A few months ago, i was still contemplating whether Shanghai is right place to go on an exchange(not like i have the choice to go elsewhere), i mean, China has a certain kind of image(more negative ones) in people's(Singaporeans generally) minds i guess.. Unlike Europe or other western countries which somehow seems more 'wow', especially in the course of architecture. But now, as of 6th december 2010, to me, china is not like it seems, or rather Shanghai mayb. Hmm, how do i say it, it's like, c'mon, the whole world is in Shanghai! You get to meet people from almost all the different countries in the world. Yes, it is still a chinese city, there are still certain 'chinese characteristics' which we as foreigners will find it hard to understand and thus use 'it's their culture' to explain it. But i think it might just be the place where you'll see the entire world.. I'm not some spokesperson for the shanghai world expo 2010, or mayb organising the expo does have a certain impact on the city. I attended some chinese pottery workshop organised by the school last weekend, and met some europeans, had conversations over beer n chinese rice wine, haha! They told me that many people 'over-beautify' their idea of european countries, especially big cities like Paris and London, and when they get to visit these cities, the kind of disappointment they get might even cause negative psychological effects for some. I'm not trying to say that "Europe is not nice, and we shldn go there", it still remains as a kind of dream travel destination for me, haha. But i wanna point out that it's time we look at other parts of the world. They might be slow, but i do see the potential in the chinese economy which the whole world has been talking about for the past dont know how many years. China is cool i must say, haha, my experience here has been really great, it's a mixed culture i guess, drinking in a uniquely chinese "bar" with the ang mohs (some roadside chinese eatery), seeing lots of chinese aunties(or rather grannies) hanging out at starbucks, going to a chinese ktv and party with new international friends.. oh mann, i guess you wont be able to find these in any other parts of the world, haha.

As a singaporean, it's a mixed feeling to live in Shanghai. i'm chinese but not 'chinese' chinese, foreigner yet not totally foreign to everything here. We speak english and chinese fluently, so we're kind of like the in-between(haha, i totally love that word right.) and it's only when u're in places like this, u'll tend to appreciate alot of things back home, the bilingual policy, the drinkable water from the tap, the endless ntuc plastic bags you get etc.. Life in S'pore is good.. haha! But i do like the affordable(or rather dirt cheap) goods(if u care less bout the quality), being able to wear winter clothings and the 3SGD mcvalue lunch in Shanghai, haha! Then again, i do miss home..

Hanging out alone most of the time for the past few months really made me think alot.. fine, u can say dat i dont have friends, but i rather hangout alone than with people i'm not comfortable with.. I like to make new friends though, and enjoy talking to people, but i think being alone gives me more freedom and i'm someone who needs lots of that. I do feel lonely at times as well(okay, let's not go into that..). The bottomline is, i thought about my life, past, present and future, so many things i wanna do and i think maybe one lifetime is not enough, haha!

I wonder how things will change when i go back home. things i do and say, my way of thinking, my relationship with people etc. They say going on an exchange is like the time of your life, yes yes, i'm enjoying my life right now, yet i think i'm missing out on certain things. I want to not miss out anything in life, is it even possible? am i asking for too much?

one problem with me: there is often no conclusion to my whole train of thoughts.

See, i told you its too much to just store in the head..

♥elgy